...You believe that every patient needs tlc, diazepam,temazepam and haloperidol.
...You would like to meet the inventor of the Nurse call buzzer some night in a dark alley.
...You believe not all patients are annoying, some are unconscious.
...Almost everything can seem humorous....eventually.
...You know the smell of different diarrhoea to identify it.
...Every time you walk you make a jingling noise because of all the Scissors and clamps in your pocket.
...You refuse to watch ER because it is too much like the real thing and it triggers flashbacks.
...Everytime someone asks you for a pen you can find at least 4 of them on you.
...You don't get excited about blood unless it's your own.
...You live by the motto "to be right is only half the battle, to convince the doctor is more difficult"
...You've told a confused patient that your name was that of your co-worker and to holler if they need help.
...You find yourself checking out other customers veins in grocery waiting lines.
...You avoid unhealthy looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they will drop near you and you'll have to do cpr on your day off.
...You have ever wanted to hold a seminar entitled "Suicide ... Doing It Right".
...You have ever had a patient look you straight in the eye and say "I have no idea how that got stuck in there".
...You hate to get dressed in "real clothes" because scrubs are what you live in and why can't they make jeans that comfortable.
...You often stay awake for 24+ hrs at a time when you work nights realize you don't need alcohol or drugs to hallucinate just lack of sleep...
...Your finger has gone places you never thought possible.
...You have seen more penises than any prostitute
...You disbelieve 90% of what you are told and 75% of what you see.
...You believe that all bleeding stops ... eventually.
...You find humor in other people's stupidity.
...Discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you.
...Your idea of fine dining is anywhere you can sit down to eat.
...You get an almost irresistible urge to stand and wolf your food even in the nicest restaurants.
...You believe chocolate is a food group.
...You refer to vegetables and are not talking about a food group.
...You have the bladder capacity of five people.
...Your idea of a good time is a cardiac arrest at shift change.
...You have your weekends off planned for a year in advance.
...You believe that unspeakable evils will befall anyone who utters the phrase "Wow, it's really quiet isn't it".
...You have ever wanted to hold a seminar entitled "Suicide ... Doing It Right".
...You have ever had a patient look you straight in the eye and say "I have no idea how that got stuck in there".
...You have ever had to leave a patient's room before you begin to laugh uncontrollably.
...You think that caffeine should be available in I/V form.
...You have been exposed to so many X-rays that you consider radiation a form of birth control.
...You will never name a daughter "Melena" or anything along those lines.. and laugh to yourself every time you hear someone by that name
...Your immune system is so well developed that it has been known to attack squirrels in the backyard.
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